1.23.13

Struggling with my self in an ocean of being:

I thought I would write every day I practiced.  I have missed a few, tho there have been thoughts every day.

Today was all about falling  I fell over a lot. Back to falling over in pincha.

It was early practice -- I've been going at 8:15 after I drop off Cleo the past two days, but today I have a nine am meeting, so I was back to the 4 am call.

Everyone needs attention right now.  I return home to daughter reading husband needing to tell stories.

1.16.13

One moon day, one Saturday and three days of rest for my period, made for a peaceful, but tentative practice today. No binding in kapotasana, due to fear. The freak outs had the upper hand. Only a couple of breaths in laghuvadrasana.... The small voice that gets to talk while yoga is clearing my brain of the larger voices said "trust the teachers who got you here." That will have to do for today.

1.14.13

This morning my practice was to sleep through with my period. I still have questions about how many days this bleeding seems to keep me from physical practice, but I suppose its for the best.  I have a sense of just having built up momentum to figure something out, like the way I freak out at regular intervals in my practice, and then my period comes around and I'm back to starting over again.  Maybe its about the rhythm of starting over -- something that I seem to have to do all the time.  Because of children, because of injury, because.... and maybe its about remembering that the physical practice is just a way into the primary goal of focus.